In this blog post, I share 5 strategies to make space for what really matters this November.
NO-vember: Making Room for Joy, Peace, and a Few More “No’s”
Welcome to NO-vember, a season where the word "no" can be just as warm and cozy as a pumpkin spice latte by the firepit. As we lean into the heart of fall, it’s the perfect time to take a step back and reflect on what we’re actually saying “yes” to—and maybe, just maybe, sprinkle in a few “no’s” to make room for a happier, more peaceful holiday season.
We often find ourselves saying “yes” to things (or people) that drain us, overwhelm us, or have us wondering, Why did I agree to this again? It’s time to practice the gentle art of saying “no” to the things that don’t fill us with joy so we can embrace the things that do.
Why “No” is the New “Yes”
Saying “no” isn’t about closing off opportunities or letting people down; it’s about preserving your energy for the things that matter most. Think of it as a way to make room for all the amazing things waiting for your full attention. Plus, “no” is actually an invitation to prioritize yourself without guilt.
And let’s be real, saying “yes” to everything can feel like a hamster wheel of obligations. By saying “no” a bit more this month, you’ll open up space for the commitments that genuinely bring you joy—like those rare moments of pure relaxation, your favorite hobbies, or spending time with people who make you laugh until your cheeks hurt.
How to Celebrate NO-vember
Here’s a fun little plan to help you lean into the power of “no” this month and create more time for what fills you up:
Take Stock of Your “Yeses”Jot down all your current commitments. From the weekly meetings to the extra volunteer gig you said yes to last spring, get it all on paper. Sometimes just seeing it all in one place can be an eye-opener (or a reason to make more coffee). I like to think of this as similar to as a school leader when I would do an initiative inventory so that my team’s plates weren’t overflowing.
Do a “Joy Audit”For each item on your list, ask yourself, Does this bring me joy, peace, or purpose? Think of this like a Marie Kondo-style decluttering of your time. If a commitment leaves you drained, consider if it’s time to let it go—or at least loosen your grip a bit. (Pretend you're Emily Gilmore in the first episode of the Gilmore Girls Netflix revival when the dining room chairs don’t bring her joy🤣)
Identify the “Shoulds”Ah, the “shoulds.” These are things we say yes to because we feel we should—not because we really want to. NO-vember is a perfect time to give yourself permission to skip these. Remember, there’s freedom in realizing you don’t have to do everything. My friend Lindsay Titus often refers to “Shouldville” and it always resonates with me any time I see her post about it or hear her talk about it.
Practice Your Gentle “No”Saying “no” kindly takes a bit of practice, so try this approach: “Thank you for thinking of me! I’m going to have to pass, but I appreciate the offer.” This lets people know that you value their invite or opportunity but are choosing to honor your own priorities. As an introvert I’ve had to really practice this over the years (and it’s not always easy to do still).
Reclaim Your TimeWith every “no” you say this month, you’re creating space for the “yeses” that really matter. Use this newfound time for whatever brings you peace and fulfillment. Whether it’s relaxing, learning something new, or spending time with loved ones, enjoy the joy of a few extra hours. Protect that calendar like The Grinch protects his!
Here’s to a NO-vember Full of Intentional Choices!
With each “no” we say this month, we’re choosing a little more peace, a little more joy, and a whole lot more energy for what matters. So let’s embrace NO-vember together, filling our lives with intentional choices, a few good laughs, and time to just breathe. Here’s to a month of purposeful “no’s” and some wonderfully wholehearted “yeses.”
Happy NO-vember!
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